Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
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