sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
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