Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
I think i sorta joined a cult last night
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
I accidently shit my pants. So I tried to throw my underwear in their lake, but they floated. So in the middle of the night, I got into the paddle boat and had to throw a rock on top of them so they would sink. Next time, I just won't shit myself.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
The bar has bullet holes in the ceiling, and the country singer had been playing drunken weezer covers. A man just bought me a beer on the grounds that I 'have his back' in a fist fight with a stranger texan. And, yes, the bartender is wearing a sherif's badge
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
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