so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
Randomize
