Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
I get so lonely sometimes I set my phone's alarm to go off every 5 minutes or so and imagine people are texting me.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
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