Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
My crowning drunk achievement from that night was donating $5 to the Obama campaign.
You're perfect
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
Randomize
