o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
organizing the empties. That sober.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
Randomize
