This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
it's not cheating when I paid for it
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
Randomize
