it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
Next time I try to break into the police station drunk, please stop me.
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
Randomize
