..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
You fell asleep mid BJ last night. I put your pants back on you. My ego is pretty bruised this morning.
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
i totally just wrapped her wedding gift in tin foil. These are the skills 2 bachelor's degrees have given me.
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
You called his parrot a seagull, a pigeon and a rat with wings, and told it to go eat Cheetos out of a dumpster.
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
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