I wannas sexs uuuuu
I'm eating all of the evidence.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
I almost didn't wake up for my first day of work. The 3rd bottle of champagne was a mistake. And the 2nd bottle of wine after that was probably excessive
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
Sorry, my phone died and I decide to charge my vibrator instead. #priorities
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
Randomize