Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way"
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
Randomize
