she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
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