Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
I've been smelling a baby wipe for three minutes. I didn't think I was that drunk but I guess I am
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
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