i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
Randomize