He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
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