I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
the vacuum is drunk
what?
i spilled my drink and tried to vacuum it and now the vacuum is drunk
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
Randomize
