i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
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