38 yer olds are good kisserssss
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
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