I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
I love you.
Bad choice
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
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