i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
She's just so happy...and so naked.
I should start prefacing bondage with girls saying "I know you've read 50 Shades, but there is a 33% you're gonna freakout and go home, while I jerk it alone"
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
Randomize