I hope mine doesn't look like that
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
