So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
Hooray! My email address wasn't leaked by Ashley Madison!
I will chop off your penis
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