Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
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