doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
How'd your date go last night?
Well I blacked out at 1:30 and woke up naked in not-my-date's bed with an uneaten Jimmy John's sandwich.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Randomize
