now i know why i became what i already was.
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
I am paying my roommate as much of the electric bill in pennies as possible because I hate her.
The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Randomize
