we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
Kristen just told everyone at the bar that I've got a huge dick, now Brittany is giving me the eye. What is the opposite of FML?
Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Randomize
