we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
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