ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
Randomize
