I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
