Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
I sent the random girl I had sex with last night a 'happy mothers day' text as a reminder to get the morning after pill.
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
One of my students in my 8am class brought me a Tim Hortons cup with a bloody Mary in it. Clearly, I didn't manage to look not drunk when I ran into him at Denny's at 4am. Who decided to let me teach?
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
Nothing screams "crazy cat lady" like a nursery in your house when you're over 30, single and have no kids.
Randomize
