can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
I had a dream about a turtle sitting on top of a horse skull. I'm certain its a symbol for my dead sex life. Trust me.
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
