But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
Randomize
