It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
Last time Jon threw a party I woke up on my porch, no shirt but 4 bras on, and "make better life choices" written on my stomach in sharpie
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
Randomize
