im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
Someone painted a weed leaf on my leg with red paint. Or blood. I hope paint.
Holy fuck just found a used tampon in the leg of my pants. it's not paint. It's. Not. Paint.
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
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