i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
Randomize
