you can't spend the night you always smell like dirty underwear and my roommates complain
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
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