I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
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