To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
Woke up in an unfamiliar basement in a sleeping bag with Matt to a police officer shining his flashlight in my eyes and asking me my birth date and social security number. My morning went swimmingly.
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
Randomize
