I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
Randomize
