I'm pants shitting drunk right now
so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
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