He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
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