I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
you were so drunk when the pizza guy got there you told him that you didn't have any money and would trade him the pizza for 3 Porno movies and he totally did it. I may never have to pay for pizza again
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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