i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
Randomize