oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
Randomize
