You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
Randomize
