I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
Randomize
