I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
I just saw a pregnant woman with a cigarette and a beer walking into the Larry the Cable Guy show. I'm glad my taxes are paying her medical expenses.
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
