I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day.
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
Randomize
