I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
Randomize
