My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
The owner of this phone is no longer accepting texts from liars, assholes or married men. You figure out which one applies.
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize