My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
Randomize
